Markets are up for the third day in a row, even as weekly unemployment claims hit about 3.3 million, more than 10 times the previous week’s count. Plus this milestone: the U.S. notches the largest number of COVID-19 cases in the world. What gives? We’re steering straight into the dark place today.

But on the bright side, Kai’s 12-year-old just learned how to make bread, and you guys sent in some good names for this self-isolation period, like “World War Zoom,” “Pause for the Cause” and “The Day We Stopped Wearing Pants.” Find more and submit your own in our Facebook fan group.